(I dunno if Moralism is actually a ‘ism’, but I’m lame and didn’t know what else to put)
(btww, Thank so much everyone for your comments on my last post, they really mean a lot to me. -and don’t be afraid to write super long comments, i love them!)
So I have written about this once before here (I would def. read this understand where I am coming from): http://lovemeformexox.deviantart.com/journal/13872640/
That one is from July, so it is a bit old and I feel a little torn now because my views have changed slightly with some view feminists have (which I really didn’t know about until recently, how lame is that?)
So, whilst reading my Bitch magazine (which all my relatives gave me weird looks when they saw it. It seemed like they were thinking “eh gods my relative is a feminist… A FEMINIST! HELP!”.. but whatever) there was an article in it about putting a moral value on how a woman dresses- i.e. She must be horrible person because she is showing off so much skin and she is a skank, etc. This article struck me, because that is how I think a lot of the time. But I don’t think that because “oh, she is a woman and must conceal herself!”- erm, no.
The reason I hate when women (well, more leaning towards girls, if you are a grown woman wear whatever you want) dress like that is because I don’t think most of them are dressing that way because it makes them feel good. Being that I am in high school, so many girls will wear mini skirts in the middle of February! It’s ridiculous! Atleast in the summer wearing less clothing makes sense! I don’t think they wear them for themselves, they are wearing them to get attention from boys and are trying sooo hard to be ’sexy’. And I hate that. hate hate hate it. I’m all for showing off what you got, but I don’t see why it has to be so much of it. It’s not like men go around wearing mini shorts during February for the ladies, they just don’t do it because they would freeze their bloody legs off. I just don’t see why women feel the need to show off their bodies like they are a public display when men don’t (obviously there are exceptions where men probably do show it all off, but generally speaking here).
Maybe I am just agianst 14 year olds trying to be ‘hot’ and ’sexiii’. My sister tries so fucking hard to be a ’sexi’ girl and it’s disgusting. I used to think “what does she expect men to think when she wear these things?” but I have gotten away from that. The men can learn to keep it in their fucking pants, that’s what. But still, I don’t see why she tries so hard. She is only 14. It’s like she is a different person sometimes. When she is hanging around the house in her pajamas and being my sister rather than the socialite, I love her. But when she gets her makeup on and her skimpy skirt, I hate her. I hate the image she sends out.
I dunno… Maybe because I was always chubby I never wore skimpy clothes. I never wanted to show off my body. Now I feel differently, but I still don’t dress so the whole world can see what’s mine. I don’t feel as though I have to show skin to feel great about myself. It’s not like I wear full pant suits during summer or anything, heck I am the fat girl who likes to wear a bikini! But I just don’t know… Maybe it’s not that women who wear less have a moral problem, I just see it as disrespectful to oneself to sell yourself so short as to wear less to prove your worth. All the time I see women showing skin on TV or in the movies it is so satisfy men, not to have her own self worth (except How to Look Good Naked- you know how much I love that show!- and the article I wrote about the show for extra credit got into my school’s newspaper! woot! sorry, just had to mention lol). Other than that, it seems everytime I see skin, it’s for a guys benefit….
Just last night my sister was talking about a girl we saw at Barnes and Noble – “Did you see how short that skirt was that she was wearing?” or “Did you see how short that dress was?”…. That fucking pisses me off! I tell her “I don’t want to hear you talk about that, you wear the same things.” She just kinda mumbles that she doesn’t. UGHHHH. She complains about her friends wearing super short shorts. UGHHH “YOU WEAR THE SAME FUCKING THINGS!” You know what? I don’t like her when she dresses like a skank. She gets mad at me when I think she is a whore. I’m sorry, i just hate this persona that you slip into for everyone else.
….. *sigh*
Maybe I just attack a moral value to this stuff for my sister. Maybe I just need to feel that dressing like that gives her a negative, since she is thinner (not really thin, but still..), prettier, has a new boyfriend every stinkin week, and socialite queen. I dunno… I just hate how she shows off for guys all the time and acts like she is stupid. Because I know it isn’t for herself, it’s for everyone else. Not to mention she is just 14!! Maybe that’s my problem- all these young girls showing off their body for men. I just don’t think it is right or fair. Grown women can make choices for themselves, but sometimes younger ones don’t always know what’s best. I know I certainly didn’t when I was 14.
Well, other than my sister, I try now not to judge a girl when I see her dressing ’slutty’ (we need to use that for guys too, it’s never used to refer to them! um, not fair much?), but I just wonder why she feels she needs to dress that way.
I dunno…. this is a messy subject and a messy post… I hope remotely got my feelings across without sounding like an ignorant anti-feminist ass or something…. gah…
Well, I have to work at 4, so I better go relax before that time.
Heh,
how times change. I can say this much, at least from my perspective, girls at 14 didn’t reveal as much skin when I was that age as they do now. Even girls that age now who aren’t wearing necessarily what is considered provocative clothing still sometimes wear clothing to accentuate their, erm, assets. Just wearing a somewhat low-cut top if she is busty is enough at times. That doesn’t even get into the whole mini-skirt and midriff showing halter tops that are everywhere on girls that shouldn’t even be allowed out of the house.
Can’t help but think of the father in Ten Things I Hate About You and what he put his youngest daughter through. I’m not so sure I wouldn’t feel the same way if I had a teenaged daughter.
Part of the reason women start to ’show off’ skin is linked to, well, puberty and their natural cycles. Its not a joke, and I’m not trying to be prurient/sick, but the closer a woman is to her period, the more skin she generally shows. Most people aren’t even cognizant of it cause its something thats simply hardwired into us from 3 million years of human evolution. Not that this is an excuse, especially for girls that are, in our society, not considered old enough to make that sort of decision.
Part of the problem IS parents not taking responsibility for their kids actions. Part of it is also a teenager’s natural need to rebel against their parents (though sometimes rebellion starts either earlier or later than ‘usual’). I ought to know as I have a neice who is not even a teenager yet and is already showing signs that she would behave similarly to your sister. And my moronic sister does nothing to stop it (the Mother’s Curse really bit her on the keister, since from what my Mother says, my sister put her through very similar situations).
Do I want women walking around in potato sacks? No, I’m fully cognizant of the fact that I am a male Homo Sapiens Sapiens and love the sight of nearly nude mature females of the species. I DON’T, however, want to see some preteen or even young teen girl wearing next to nothing. Ugh. Cover up. Be a kid while you still can. We enjoy a long lifespan now and there is no need for someone that young to begin acting like they want to have children.
Maybe I’m just an old fuddy-duddy. Of course, I’m younger than the Baby-Boomers who epitomized the ‘Me’ generation and are now the parents or grandparents of many of these potential problem children. Who wants to see a 10 yr old girl with shorts on that say ‘Delicious’ across her butt? Ewww. But walk to any mall in the country and you’re likely to see that.
By: Brooklyn Red Leg on February 16, 2008
at 5:27 pm
Even in the teenage years when some girls just want a boyfriend (I know I did) most of it is actually about competition *between* girls. I’ve always found the biggest failing of the feminist movement, aside from its many schisms, is that it never does much to address female competitive syndrome, which in my experience has done far more to set back women than women becoming sexualized at continuously younger ages.
The girls wearing short skirts, and talking about “OMG, did you see what she WORE?” aren’t really doing it for boys – boys are just one more trophy in the girl-on-girl war out there. They’re doing it as a way of establishing a silent pecking order; she with the best clothes, the best boyfriend, and the most envy “wins.”
I’m not sure what can really be done about it. Call it out? Refuse to participate? I never found the right answer at 17, and nowadays I try to do what I can to stay out of it, but that ugly FCS still pops up in my friendships.
By: Di on February 17, 2008
at 12:05 am
At 19, I look at little kids and I’m sometimes shocked by how little they wear and how scantily they dress. However, at that age, I was doing the same thing.
Was I ever interested in boys? No.
I just enjoyed my body. I loved makeup, I still do, and I was wearing it in grade 7. I remember I had a pair of fantastic pants that laced all the way up the legs to my hip. A bit slutty? Probably, but I loved them to peices (quite literally). I loved heels, and skirts (of all lengths) and low-cut tops. I had boobs, I liked my boobs and I liked how they looked in certain shirts.
Maybe it was somewhat innappropriate for my age and I’ve changed my style a lot since then, but I think that young girls feel a need to display themselves and their sexuality. They’ve got these awesome new bodies, why shouldn’t they revel in them and get it out of their systems.
I look at it now and laugh at the 9th graders in their make-up and their shorty shorts and their half-length puffy jackets. I look at the 20 year old girls going off to the club and I think that they are WAY TOO OLD to be dressing like the way they are.
I think kids are just trying to prove that they’re women now, that they’re all grown up. And I think that’s okay. It only starts getting to me when they’re old enough to know better. “You’re 18, you’ve got a rack, we know, we get it.”
By: Shine Out on March 5, 2008
at 12:09 pm